My young boyfriend breaks up because of my age

Linda writes, "I am a young looking 46 year old woman, dating a 30 years old guy. I have 3 kids, he has one, he can not handle our age difference. He will not be seen in public with me as he says people look at us. We have a very good sex life, we get along most days, we make each other laugh, he now wants the relationship over. We still live together, until I find another house. I am so heartbroken. I love him so much. Please help."

I am sorry to hear that, and unless there is some other reason that he is breaking up (affair, for example) with you and using the age gap as an excuse, there is hope. This is why and this is how you should speak to your stupid boyfriend.

I have dated really fat women (I am incredibly skinny) and women of other races and while they were my age, people have looked at us, even exchanged meaningful glances with their companions. Some even hinted about the odd choice of women that I made. And occasionally they still do despite my being in a perfect marriage with a woman of another race.

People love to talk, and they will, no matter what. If they can't find anything else they will talk about the hideous red jacket a woman wore or the shoes that a man wore or what the kids did or the lousy kitchen the couple has, and on and on.....

Those who live their life to satisfy others are never happy because people will always figure out to express their opinions about them, particularly about successful people. We live in a world of people with opinions and smart people know how to ignore it in order to sleep better at night.

Your boyfriend has to start being a man and appreciate that he is ending a beautiful relationship (which are nearly impossible to find these days based on dozens of emails I get each day) all because some jerks tell him that he is dating a woman older than him. Tell him to have some self respect for himself and you and not be such a sissy. I mean will he shave his head off tomorrow if people start talking about his awful hairstyle or quit his job if people start making fun of the company he works for? Or throw his kid out of the house because some other mom thinks that his kid is an idiot?

So, talk to him and tell him that there are more important issues at stake for him than merely ending a relationship with a woman just because she is a little older. He has to learn to take ownership of his choices and put his happiness above that of others (yes, people talk because that adds spice to their lives).

And just between you and I, if this man pays no attention to this logic, guess what? He is not the man for you. A man who cannot take on the society to fight for his choices and to protect the love of his life, I mean, do you really want to spend the rest of your life with this man no matter how good he is in bed?

Y need a man who respects you and respects his choices, and then has the courage to defend him and his family against the world. If he is now proving that others opinions are more important than his and yours, I would say, find one of those efficiency apartments and move out now.