How can I be less shy while making love?

Kristin writes, "I'm only shy when it comes to making love. What I am trying to say is that professionally or in public settings, I am not shy. But I never initiate sex and I don't engage in it. Like, I don't make noise and I rarely kiss my husband during sex. I'm crying as I type because I know I have a serious problem and I know I'm frustrating my husband and eventually will hurt my marriage. I want to be freaky and enjoy my husband but I don't. Before my marriage, I was the same way with guys especially because I knew that it wasn't a commitment. Now that I'm committed, it's now hurting me. Not sure if it stems from me not seeing my father show affection with my mother or what, but I would think that I would better be good at this. When we do have sex now it just 'wham bam thank you Ma'm." He's frustrated, I know. That's why I'm having this problem. I also feel now that if I try to change he isn't gonna appreciate it. Just yesterday we talked and he told me that I don't excite him anymore. I need help."

I am so sorry to hear that you were crying while writing this and when you wrote above that "Just yesterday we talked and he told me that I don't excite him anymore" your problem is serious enough. Generally that is a very strong sign that a man is frustrated and is either likely to cheat or stop loving you or even ask for a divorce. And trust me, as a man I can tell you that love is important but sex is definitely #1 for any man.

And I think your current behavior it may have little do with your upbringing. My father died when I was a little boy and my mother did not have a relationship after that but I grew up to be a normal man with healthy sexual appetite.

The good news is that the way you can learn to drive a car or cook a new dish or learn to speak Chinese, you can learn how to enjoy sex too. Like anything else, all it requires is an inquisitive mind, patience, and hard work.

Now do not expect to become a sex goddess overnight but the way you have learned everything else in life, you can learn how to do this too well by taking one step at a time.