How to prepare for first date after meeting online?

Erin has met someone online and through emails, chat, and webcam, they have been talking for a while now. The relationship has reached a point that her online boyfriend has decided to visit her and she is nervous about their first meeting. "Could you expand a bit more for me about the pitfalls of first meetings? Looks are one thing. I know. I like his looks in the pics I have but, honestly, looks are not that important to me. I have met enough men, who have seen the pics I post online and say they do not do me justice, to be reasonably confident that he will be pleased with what he sees in me, though still will be nervous about that to some extent. I prefer to prepare myself in advance as much as possible for what lies ahead, so I would appreciate anything you could share with me as to what may go wrong - what surprises there may be - in the first meeting?" she asks.

Regarding the challenges of first meeting after a long period of dating online, let me say that, as we spend more time getting to know someone before we actually meet, we are better prepared in many ways. There are, obviously, fewer surprises, but online communication is more structured and one can prepare a lot more. In person, one has to be more spontaneous. That is why we might learn that a patient person isn't really that patient, or always-happy man isn't really such a pleasant person. The same applies to one's looks and other aspects of personality.

I think a lot of time after knowing someone online, we start to assume that we know that person, but in reality it is just what one might know after one or two dates. In other words, start with the hypothesis that it is just your first or second date and there is so much more to find out about each other. So maintain the distance so as not to treat yourself as married to him but also the curiosity to know more, and everything will be just fine. Of course, you want to be aware that he maybe surprised and/or disappointed by things over which you have no control. So there will be some uncomfortable moments, as there are in any dating situation, but in the end you want to be yourself and then just wait to find out if you still feel the same way after meeting.