Norah writes, "Your advice to a woman dating a man more than 30 years older than her was very useful. But what about a 70+ year old woman and a 50+ year old man. What is your take on this relationship since Americans are so opposed to the older woman-younger man relationship."

Yes, somewhat less common, but I no longer agree with the statement that Americans are opposed to older woman-younger man relationship. Power is clearly more evenly distributed between men and women now than it was 50 years ago as some women are increasingly making more money than men.

Obviously, there will be men who will tease you or ridicule your younger partner (and women who will give you a hard time due to jealousy), but in the end, people will do that with something else anyway. The best way to deal with this is to simply ignore them.

If you have found the right man and he is not afraid and embarrassed to be with you, go ahead and pursue the relationship. People generally back off when you show them you are serious about the relationship and you are willing to take on the world to pursue your dream.

Lisa writes, "The sex used to be great with my boyfriend but I want him to love me slowly not bam bam bam, so fast sometimes that I don't enjoy it any more. I explained to him that I wanted him to do some things different and please me, make love to me slowly and passionately. I have done all I can to talk to him and it's not working. My feelings have taken a drastic change for the worse and I am wondering if I should just throw him out of my life."

Regarding sex, he has the same issues as millions of other men do. For them sex is not about foreplay or intimacy; it is a way to release themselves and then go to sleep. These men have simply not learned to appreciate that a woman is not just a receptacle but a person with feelings.

All a girl can do in these circumstances is to request and you have done that, but I have little hope from him considering that he has not taken the time to learn lovemaking.

I am noticing that you seem like a nice, sweet, responsible girl and while this man has a few great qualities, he is not the man for you long term. What you want is a man who will not only do what he does but also make passionate love to you treating you like a woman with feelings rather than just a toy.

He will need to learn how to make love to you and you will teach him how to do it. Give him a chance to get it right in 3 months, and if you see no change, throw him out of the house.

Katie writes, "I have been in a relationship with a truck driver for two years. He is faithful, loving, and spiritual. He is great with my children, helpful around the house and he's considerate. My problems are he does not help pay bills no matter how much I try to talk about it and no matter how much I fuss over it. He will give me one hundred dollars toward a bill or nothing at all but mainly it's nothing at all. I don't want to end the relationship but I feel that I have done all I can. I even put him out of my house because of the finances. I am confused because he wants to work things out and I don't know what to do."

If I understand the living arrangements right, he is abusing it -- you pay the bills and he lives rent free. If he is not helping pay the bills, I am assuming that he does not consider himself part of the household.

As a truck driver he is probably on the road most of the time and when he is in town, he just sleeps in your house (and he thinks he is a guest). It is a perfect arrangement for him -- he does not need to have a place, pay rent for it and maintain it, but he still has a place to call his own.

He is clearly exploiting the situation. I think that you have done enough to address it and the only course left for you is that you tell him not to come and stay with you when he is in town. He is still welcome to date you but as far as finding a place to sleep he should figure that out.

If he wants to work things out, well, then, sit down and rewrite the rules. He will need to contribute a fixed amount each month towards the bills if he wants to have a nice, warm bed when he needs it. No payments and he is out of the house.

My husband is having an affair with a colleague

Anne writes, "My husband works with a female and they talk all the time. One day we ran into her at a public place, he went to speak to her and she would not speak back. I was with him and this was the first time I would have met her. She acted as though she didn't know him. This sparked something in me. I asked my husband what's was going on. He claims he didn't know. I told him if she couldn't speak to you in front of me then he shouldn't be talking to her anymore. However they still speak all the time. I checked the phone records and confronted him. He swears they are just friends. I believe this is total disrespect to me and that she keeps him as a friend despite her disrespect to me. He says I'm overreacting. I know I'm not but what is your opinion about husbands with female friends?"

As a married man my rule of thumb is that all females and couples friends should socialize with my wife in all cases; if they do not want my wife, I have no need for their friendship because I offer the same (the only exceptions are group settings that may include my male buddies, and obviously, all business/professional meetings).

In other words, if your husband is reluctant or embarrassed to hang out with her in your presence, something is not right.

Having said that, if your relationship is otherwise great and you have no other complaints with him or your marriage, you can give him some freedom to have personal friends. Maybe there is something special about her that fulfills a part of his life, maybe he enjoys her company for some special reason; the reality is that you cannot stop him from talking to her and if you desperately tried to do so, you will only create a lot of bitterness in your marriage. He might just resent you a lot for this. Unless he has stopped loving you and has abandoned you for the sake of this girl, it might very well be a harmless friendship that you might be making a big deal about. I have had female friends from my single days, and they are so dear to me, and my wife is fine with that as long as I am a great husband otherwise.