Loretta writes, "My fiance is and has cheated on me. I asked him recently and he said no but I have seen texts to other women and I have seen pictures with other women several years ago when we were in a relationship but he still denies that he has cheated and he wants to know what I known to accuse him of this. I will not tell him what I know. He has been trying to see me since I told him over the phone that he has cheated on me but I will not see him. So tonight he told me to call him when I want to see him. This is how I feel if he does not admit he cheated. I do not want anything to do with him. What do you think of what I am doing? Should I do something different? I have been with this guy for 15 years. He is my only adult boyfriend. I want to get married before I get too old."

I am so sorry to hear that you are stuck with a man for so long who is addicted to cheating.

At this time you have some decisions to make. This man appears to be not reliable. So even if you give him on last chance, he might still go back to cheating. And you know very well that it is easy to breakup but so much more complicated to get a divorce.

I would suggest that you sit down with him and have another person (a family member or friend that you both respect) join you. Show him the evidence that you have and ask him what his response is. Maybe he has an explanation! If not, it maybe time to just say goodbye to him and move on. I am sure that you can find another man that will love only you and no one else.

Erica, yet another woman in a sexless marriage, writes, "My husband has not made love to me in years. He has erectile dysfunction. I've tried to talk to him about it and get some help. The doctor gave him a device to use. His ego won't let him use it, I guess. So I have been very hot for a good while. Now I have been thinking about getting with someone else. I want to stay with my husband and I love him but I feel things and have needs. What is your thought?"

I have seen this problem in hundreds of emails that I have received from women. Men who simply refuse to accept that a health problem can be corrected and no one would doubt their manhood just because they need and use medical help.

I totally understand how you feel, and in my opinion, you have a right to satisfy your needs. Feeling sexual desire is as normal as the way you feel hungry or thirsty or tired.

There are two ways to go about it. Talk to your husband and agree on an arrangement (I doubt if this is possible in your case) in which you can have sex with someone else and he should not ask any questions. You will have a right to privacy about this issue.

A more practical solution for your specific situation is to just keep it a secret. The key is to be upfront about this to the man (or men) that you might have as your lovers and also seek his cooperation so that he does not blackmail you, and helps you keep it a secret. Online dating websites are best for this.

Can I cheat on my spouse?

So it turns out that more of us are cheating and the Internet and other communication technologies are helping us. National Science Foundation and University of Chicago have found that infidelity is rising among older men and young couples.

The other very interesting part is that women are now cheating more often. The data from the research shows that about 10% of married people — 12 percent of men and 7 percent of women — say they are sleeping with someone they are not married to.

I think adultery is not necessarily unhealthy for a relationship if it is done to get what is not available in your relationship (Related: When is adultery acceptable?). Rather than suffer and get depressed, it may be perfectly alright to get it some place else.

Let us say that you enjoy certain type of bedroom adventure and your spouse does not want to participate. Guess what? It is perfectly fine to try it with someone else. Most people who have written to me after taking this approach have found that it only strengthened their marriage and they found that they were happier overall. Will and Jada Pinkett Smith seem to have a very open relationship because they can talk about these things.