Samantha writes, "I am attracted to a man much older then me. He's very reserved and slightly reclusive. However, I would love to pursue him, but my twenty-something seduction tactics aren't working. What should I do?

Your problem is twofold. One is his being reserved and reclusive and that will make it harder for a woman even his age to break his shell.

Two, most older men assume that very young girls will never be interested in them. For instance, being in my 40s, I typically don't expect girls in their 20s to even pay attention to me, but I sure can figure out when a woman (regardless of her age) is really interested in me. At that point, I can ignore her if I do not think that I should be exploring a relationship with such a young woman. Or, if I think it is a nice thing to do, I will reciprocate.

In my opinion, it would be much safer for you to approach him non-romantically (e.g. could you work for him a few hours a week helping organize his papers?) and over time as you two spend some time together he might realize that you are not just an assistant. At that point, a romantic move will help. Yes, it is somewhat easy to seduce your boss.

I heard from Tiffany, an extremely shy woman, whose relationship was on the rocks because of her reluctance to do anything in bed other than to lie down like a lifeless woman and hope that her husband would be pleased.

Fortunately, she realized her mistake and wanted to do something me. She contacted me and I gave a bunch of tips to her to overcome her shyness and become more active in bed. I thought I will reproduce a transcript of my chat conversation with her (if you are in a similar situation and need help, please contact me) in which I gave her tips on how to seduce her husband.

me: I wanted to discuss the lingerie options with you and give you some tips. What do you have?
tiffany: I have a sheer babydoll. It is kinda black with pink trim.
me: I like the black and pink combination one. Do you have a robe?
tiffany: Yes, I have a robe.
me: I think what I want you to do is to wear the babydoll and then wear a robe. And then act as if it is all usual; nothing special.......now do not turn off the lights but just before going to bed.....either use a dimmer or turn on a dim night lamp. And just before sliding in to the bed, quietly open the robe and let it slide to the floor. I am sure that he will notice what you are wearing.
tiffany: Yes he will and I guess everything will happen naturally from then on.
me: That is what I am expecting and from then on you can continue with the flow. Has he seen this babydoll before?
tiffany: Yes.
me: Have you ever done anything like this before?
tiffany: I tried...
me: And?
tiffany: I was too shy to pull it off. I have some rose petals...can I use them? Or is that too much?
me: Rose petals to put on the bed?
tiffany: yeees
me: This is what I think..all this time my strategy has been to make you appear as this cute, innocent girl who does not have much knowledge about sex and I don't want him to guess that you have professional help or that you are being someone who you are not. The more natural progression it appears to be the better it is...the slower the change in you the better it is. He will get suspicious that the sudden change is coming from something else like you having an affair or something. You still want to be that innocent girl that is shy but who is turning a bit naughty slowly. So this lingerie thing is a small step, especially because it is not something new that you bought. It will also raise your self confidence about seduction. And also you will learn more about your own body. Eventually you can take more charge of what goes on in bed.
tiffany: I can't wait. That's the way it should be anyway....
me: I know but hey we all gotta learn something some day.....but your shyness kept you from it.

Mark writes, "I have a friend that is not so close to me but we do hang out once in a while. I like his wife and I don't know how to approach her. The only signal she gives me is whenever she looks at me she looks straight into my eyes when her husband is not looking. What should I do and how should I approach this married woman? Sometimes she gives me a cute little smile. I don't know if she is also interested in me."

I see a few problems here. First of all you are not close to your friend. If you like his wife, you better get really close to your friend. Hang out with him more often and try to find common areas for you to strengthen your friendship.

I think the more time you spend with both of them the more the chance that you will be considered a friend and will allow you to spend more time with her assessing her situation. Eventually I would like you to get to the point that you can just ask his wife to do something with you together. For example, if she is good in accounting you can ask her to help you with your taxes. Or if you are going to find a gift for your sister you can ask her to go along with you help you pick the right dress or jewelry.

You will have to spend a few months building trust with both her and her husband. Just treat them both as merely good friends and completely put aside your sexual attraction towards her for a few months (not only you might lose your friend, things could tun ugly for you if this man is of violent nature). You shouldn't tell her anything till you are 100% confident that she is interested in you and you will find that out from her conversations over time. Women are pretty good at making their intentions known.

How do I seduce my dad's friend?

Brittany writes, "I am attracted to the best friend of my father. I'm not sure that he has been looking at me, but I think my dad warned him because he knows what he's like. He's overprotective. In fact, he never looks at me, even when it wouldn't be inappropriate for him to do so. However, he did smile at me when my dad was nagging me yesterday, as if to say 'what's he like' or something. He also spoke, briefly, directly to me for a change. I know he was probably just being friendly, but it's a start. So, bearing in mind my dad's always around and I am a shy, modest person, how can I get his attention and eventually attract him? I am 21."

It is natural to get attracted to a "fatherly" figure. Daughters always have a special connection to their dads and obviously they are attracted to the friends of their dads.

And it appears to me that this man has been looking at you in a certain way and that is why your dad has been warning him. It also means that if something were to happen between the two of you, it would not make your father happy. And it might even destroy the relationship with his best friend. Do you think it is worth this risk?

If it is, then of course, it is possible for you and him to have a secret relationship. Obviously you will need to hint to him that you are also interested and he can trust you. I think once he is assured of confidentiality and interest, it should be pretty easy from there.

I think it is always a good idea to have a modest goal first. And since you are shy, it is best to first start talking to him more often. That will give both of you a higher level of comfort to at least smile at each other more often and even start flirting. I think you can start off by asking him more questions about something that could be of interest to him and to you, at least to some extent. It could be something that he is good at, or might love to talk about, say sports or gardening or cooking.

It also does not hurt to show interest in something that you may want to learn from him. Just as an example, let us say he is really good at making an egg sandwich -- it is something that you can ask him to teach. It is something that will not involve any sexual tension and your dad might want to share the sandwich too.

My goal is for him to see that you like to be around him and then he can simply make other things happen from there. Most men his age what to do once a girl has shown her intentions.