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First
time sex
Things to know when you lose your
virginity
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Pratima
writes, "Like most
Indian women, I was a
virgin when I got married to my
husband 10 months ago. The sad news
that my husband and I have not been
able to have intercourse yet. I feel
enormous pain and I feel that my
internal organs will burst if he tries
to push too hard. Is it normal to
experience a lot of pain when a
woman loses her virginity? I have
seen a doctor also, she checked me,
and told us every thing is alright.
She told me that may be I am afraid of
having intercourse and may be during
that time my vaginal muscles contract.
Can you please suggest a path forward
since we both are clueless and don't
know what to do. We also want to
have our first baby but since our
marriage is yet to be consummated, we
are both
depressed." |
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I
am sorry to hear that you have still
not been able to enjoy
physical intimacy so far. I think
I agree with your doctor that your
fear is causing you undue
stress. That does two things. One,
it prevents you from being aroused and
releasing your juices, which provide
lubrication for easy penetration.
Secondly, without you realizing it,
you might be contracting your pelvic
muscles. You may also have
vaginal dryness. At your age
it should not be painful. Actually it
should be a fun and pleasurable
activity. Here is what you should do: |
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- Relax. It is not
painful; otherwise human beings
wouldn't be having it. It is the
greatest source of pleasure for
us.
- Learn how to make
love - it is pretty easy. Buy a good
guide like
Kama Sutra or rent some
educational videos. You will learn a
lot but the best thing is to try
yourself. Also make sure that you
both have a lot of
foreplay prior to penetration so
that you are totally aroused and
lubricated
- If you just want
to
make love for pleasure, then try
a
vaginal lubricant and also use a
lubricated condom. Saliva is
also a good lubricant for both of
you. However, if you are trying to
get pregnant (but first learn to
have it first, I think) do not use a
lubricant or saliva (they both kill
sperms). Instead, if you need
lubrication, use a sperm-friendly
intimate moisturizer (e.g.
Pre-Seed) or egg whites.
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Women must sniff their partner's sweat
Men dream of sex in public |
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What
do you think? Share your
thoughts with us
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