Dating an Asian man

Dating Asian men
Story of an American woman's relationship

I am an American woman and my boyfriend just happens to be Asian. He grew up in Taiwan, and throughout our relationship, and it is still early on in the relationship, I have fallen in love with that Asian part of him. I am sharing my story to demonstrate that not only do people have to open their eyes and hearts to other races, they also should set aside any stereotypes that they might have about them.

Indeed, compared to men that I went to college with, my Asian boyfriend is very quiet, and even more so in social situations, but can be quite outgoing, fun, and cheerful when he is with me or with my friends. He is affectionate and caring towards me and that is what that really matters to me.

Now I DO know that I am his first American girlfriend; his other previous two girlfriends have been Asian, and spoke Chinese, Japanese or English. But I also know that I am the first girlfriend to move in with him as well. He is not dating another Asian girl, and many of the social gatherings are very much Asian dominated. The places we go to hang out are all Asian-dominated as well, and so on.

And although I have noticed that I have seen Asian women with American men, I have not so far seen more than five Asian men/American women couples. That could very well be because older Asian people still ask me and my boyfriend when we are getting married - a somewhat awkward question for me since it is still early on in the relationship and I would like to take that decision myself rather than be guided by someone else. I must confess though that these elders always make me feel a part of everything, although a few younger Asian people and couples have given us the eye.

All in all though, we are happy with each other, love each other very much, and very soon I shall be meeting his mother who is traveling half way across the globe to see her sons (and me).

I think the stereotype of the Asian men being quiet and less outgoing may be true on SOME points, but those who are more willing to be "American" may also be more outgoing like American men. My boyfriend tells me though that Asian women are not as willing to go all out to seduce a man, and neither are men, but American men will go all out to aggressively seduce an Asian woman. Asian men find it a little harder to do so and that explains to some extent why there are so many American men dating Asian women while the versa versa is not so common.

My advice to American women who are attracted to an Asian is to just go for it with an open mind. Asian culture is changing and once you make an attempt, you will find these men are pretty open to learning more about you and changing for your sake. It is simply not true that all Asian men are macho, often commit adultery, and mistreat women. I have found my Taiwanese boyfriend to be the best that I have had and would say Yes in a heartbeat when he proposes to me.

By Amanda Caruso

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