How to build self esteem and positive body image

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We are always attracted to people with high self esteem

If you lack a positive image about yourself, you might be turning people off

Since single people meet mostly close friends and family members, they get more negative or no feedback and very little positive feedback. No wonder so many of them have low self-esteem. This is called the "Swiss Cheese Phenomenon." The basic idea is that positive feedback from others falls through the "holes" in one's body image, like the holes in Swiss cheese. However, negative feedback, no matter how much rarer, manages to stick. That's why it is difficult to develop a different attitude towards your body.

Image of an interracial couple that projects high self esteem just by their looks and style

How to change your body image?

You might want to think about changing your body image and enhance your self-esteem by filling the so-called holes in the Swiss cheese. It will require some effort on your part but it will pay off in the long run. Here is a step-wise program to enable you to help yourself. First, try to make an assessment of the degree of the phenomenon in your life. Keep track of your responses to feedback about your appearance. Do you tend to accept or resist compliments? Do you tolerate others criticizing you about how you look? Do you challenge critical comments? If you realize that you are stuck in a self-defeating cycle, make a commitment to change it. (Related article: How to feel good about your body?)

Here are few things that you can do right away without much effort to increase your self-esteem and improving your body image:

Try to make friends outside of your business contacts. Make an effort to socialize after work during the week, particularly if you are single and live by yourself. Even a quick drink after work with a friend is a great opportunity.
Do not look only at the bad aspects of your body. Look at the good ones too and feel good about them.
Do not compare yourself against others; and definitely not against models and movie stars.
Age gracefully. Learn to accept it. Make every effort to stay and look young (read our analysis of anti-aging techniques) but there is no reason to feel depressed because you are old. "Old" is a state of mind and you can change it.
Take care of yourself and always dress well, wear makeup (yes, even men need to take care of their skin every day), and maintain a positive attitude towards your body (after all it defines who you are). (Related article: Natural skincare tips)
Say "thank you" after a compliment and give your best smile instead of your natural reaction to deny it.
Be around people who support the lifestyle changes you are making, not ones who reinforce your negative body image. If you are trying to lose weight, stay away from people who are not doing anything about it. These people will only discourage it.
As you are making a sincere effort to change your reactions, every time you are successful, take note of it so that you can feel good about it.

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