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I want to be my ex-wife's
friend
I regret getting a divorce |
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Anthony writes, "I got
divorced
two months ago due to her
bipolar disorder and
alcoholism. I regret every minute of it, and now that I know
better how to deal with it, wouldn't have
divorced. If I had known her plans to move to another state
(I thought it was to room with friends who live there, whom she
visited twice), and to marry a friend who was also a
recent divorcee, I would have never petitioned. She didn't
tell me until she got there. I was shocked.
I still love her. I was considering
reconciling before that news. While only God can fix that
problem, I want to be at least
friends. I know I can be content with the situation as
devastating as it was if we remain
close friends. We talked several times during last 3 weeks,
her calling and texting 60% of the time, thanking me for talking
to her, me still having a special place in her heart and
considering her me family, and going back and forth about
whether or not God will be keeping her there. I'm not begging
her back. I did tell her how I feel, however, but let her know
she has to decide and
I want her to be happy. We also prayed over the phone three
days last week. My recent problem is that I haven't heard from
her in 6 days and so I decided to call her after work to let her
know that her new husband texted me asking me to stop all calls
and texts. I thought it was because he read our texts that she
initiated. I am still close to her family. And as much as I'd
really long term love for her to
leave her rebound husband naturally without me trying to
convince her to do it, and then come back to me if that is God's
will, I want to at least
save the friendship. I would be devastated even more and
need even more
counseling than I'm already getting if I lose what's left.
Can you help me please?" |
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You are not alone in having
regrets after divorce. A lot of people realize that they
acted too soon or
did not try hard enough to save the marriage. In very small
number of cases,
divorced couples actually remarry. In case of your
ex-wife, I am not sure if you both are feeling the same way.
She has already remarried and to hope that somehow she will
divorce her current husband and marry you is definitely a
bit far-fetched.
And
friendship with an ex-wife, while a positive thing to do and
definitely a requirement for
divorced couples with children together, is not always easy
because of
jealous spouses. Very
close friendship with an ex can also make it
harder to move on and
find love again.
My advice to you will be to put the past behind you and
make a new
beginning. There are a lot of wonderful people out there and
if you are such a
warm, loving person you will
find
love again with someone else. |
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Related:
I keep thinking about my ex
How to tell my ex girlfriend that I want her back
How to reconcile with my wife
Dating a man with baggage from previous marriage
Does my ex girlfriend want to revive our relationship
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