How to leave an abusive relationship?

Be discreet, smart, and quiet

The most loveable and charming person can suddenly turn into a monster and become an abusive partner. A lot of women simply do not know how to respond when that happens, and as a result, simply suffer the abuse. The attempt to escape a dangerous relationship is often a frightening and confusing experience, rather than one that brings them hope and relief.

Susan Pines, a survivor of intimate partner violence and author of What a Nice Guy, believes the key to a safe escape is early preparation. Pines encourages women to thoroughly consider the following three parts to a successful safety plan:

Prepare a safety kit which includes clothing, toiletries, medications, keys, money, copies of important documents, change (preferably a prepaid calling card with enough money) to use a pay phone, and a phone book or address book. Keep this kit near an exit route or with a trustworthy person.
Make arrangements to stay in a safe place, such as a shelter, hotel, or the house of someone the abuser does not know. Erase any e-mail or information on a computer that may help the abuser discover the location of the safe place. Understand that the abuser may be able to track credit card or cell phone bills to find this location. The least number of traces you leave, poorer the chances of being tracked.
Create a strategy for how to leave, especially if the situation escalates. Try to leave when the abuser is not home. Take the safety kit and leave quickly. Call a hotline, agency, or local police for more help.
Pines also stresses the importance of being discreet while planning a safe escape, saying, "If your partner suspects you are leaving, he will most likely become more violent. So it is important to prepare carefully and secretly. This is not the time to break the news to him gently in the hope it will make him less upset."

Why does my wife want a divorce Courtney Cox David Arquette divorce How can my boyfriend change so much

How to take a break from a relationship Should I stay even if my boyfriend does not want me to

What do you think? Share your thoughts with us